Getting started again with the ladies

I'm a professional British guy, with blue eyes and a bit of a geeky manner. Very inexperienced with women, and indeed have come to terms that I am unlikely ever to find a girlfriend.

Up to now I have been of the opinion that in matters of being able to attract a girl, because this is so central to that which defines the masculinity of a man, and because of its direct relevance to evolution and the ability of the man to reproduce, that it must be the case that this ability must stem from his whole success on this earth.

In other words that no techniques must be capable of changing a woman's desire for him, otherwise it would allow a man to choose his biological destiny on a logical basis, which negates this as being determined by innate fitness.


The Natural art of seduction
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I came across this book, and although I initially dismissed it as a lame attempt to part a lonely bloke with his money (as I suspect are many of these kinds of books linked from adult sites, as I know this one is), after reading some pages I was interested in what it had to say.

So I thought I'd read the book, and give it a try. Let's face it I have nothing to lose, and even if all my attempts fall flat and fail, I cannot find myself being disappointed.


Saturday 10th December 2011
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I've read half the book. It is quite addictive, and there have been several "oh yeah" moments, along with some "of course that makes complete sense" bits.
So I think it's time to try out the first lessons in the nightclubs of Basingstoke, the town where I live in the UK.

Bar Rock
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First me and my two male friends went into Bar Rock, a nightclub mainly for older people at the top of town.
Rather than standing alongside my friends as I usually do in there, all facing the dance floor, I took the author's advice (page 32-33) to stand opposite my friends, rather than side my side watching the dance floor. As they were watching the dance floor I therefore had my back to the dance floor, with a great view of the entrance to the toilets, but not a lot of women.
Feet wide apart. Hands held at belt level ready for a bit of "kino" action should I get the chance to talk to a girl.

After 15 minutes a girl came within 3 feet of me, behind me, and stopped. I turned round and said "Hey" (page 85 of the book). But I don't think she heard me.
Still it's a start.

Then we moved to a different part of the bar, and again I took my place  opposite my friends. In the middle of a pathway from the entrance to the back of the bar. Still my confidence meant that people walked around me instead of trying to push past me, so that was good. I had expected to be chastised for blocking the path a little.
Saw some girls in front of me in a "private party" section, but didn't have the bottle to approach.

I'm sure the bouncers are starting to look at me suspiciously now, for standing with my feet too far apart, and blocking the way.


Pure
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Next we walked down Wote Street and went into a new bar called "Pure".
Here it was quite crowded and we stood a meter back from the edge of the dance floor with me facing out as before.
Although I retained my legs apart pose this time I did find myself constantly jostled and pushed from all directions. By blokes AND women!

The music was louder and it just was not possible to talk to my friends, so I felt a lack of connection with them. I was unable to "enjoy my friends" as the book recommends (also page 32), so that was a negative.
Basically I don't like nightclubs, and now that I don't drink alcohol I just am not happy with that kind of environment. And I guess it must have showed.

Looking around me there were lots of groups of women having a good time. They were mostly high energy, dancing or bopping to the music or chatting ferociously, so it was not going to be easy for me to break into the group at a higher energy level than them (page 56). I looked round at one girl and thought she kept eye contact on me a little longer than normal and said "Hey" to her. But she blanked me, and I'm not sure whether she had heard me. Then there was another girl over Kevin's shoulder (he's one of the two friends), and I could have sworn that she was staring at me. So I lifted up my drink and said cheers to her (page ??) but she didn't seem to reciprocate and was perhaps in a trance. I'm not sure.
In any case she moved away shortly thereafter, and a minute later a man greeted her - it was her boyfriend.

The basic problem is that all the girls are having intensive fun and are ostensibly not interested in anyone else outside of their own groups unless they are people who are already loosely attached to their groups. i.e. their friends. To everyone else they show no signs of interest or rejection at all; you are treated no differently to a concrete post or a postbox.


And then it happened. A girl dancing right next to me started giving me a direct stare, so I said "Hey". No reply - just more dancing. But the next thing I knew she had turned around, backed up right close to me, and started wiggling her bum in my crotch. Advanced keno action initiated by the girl!
But hang on a minute this doesn't make sense; I haven't reached the "hook point" with her (page 127). And as for how to respond to the keno bum wiggling - I haven't got to that section in the book yet!

She then asked me whether I would like to drink from the straw of a bottle of beer - perched in the bra of her friend (between her tits). Chav-tastic!

Only in Basingstoke could this ever be possible...

But I had to leave the club in any case, as my friend needed his girlfriend driving home (no not THAT sort of driving) so I never knew what might have resulted from this.


In conclusion an interesting start all round.
But I don't want to start to think about whether I "did well" or not. But the thing I like about Richard La Ruina's technical approach to attracting girls is that I will no longer lament, after a failed evening, that I'm "a failure with women" rather that I failed at a particular stage in a defined process. Perhaps with the problem nailed down to a semi-specific issue, it might be possible to reach a solution, and move forward to a next stage.

There's only one way to find out...